Positivity Hunting: Finding Joy and Meaning in the Absurd

Introduction: Embracing Absurdity and Hunting for Positives

If you’re reading this, then congratulations — your first positive is already in the bag. Not only have you taken a step towards improving your entire outlook on life, but you now have your shiny new Positivity Hunting licence. Use it wisely, and welcome to the club.

If you’re a new licence holder, it’s probably because you’re fed up with the absurdities of life, and you’re looking for a way to seek those positives that, until now, have seemed like hidden artefacts rather than freely available sources of energy present in every moment.

The concept of Positivity Hunting isn’t revolutionary; it’s simply a consistent habit that, once formed, will change your life forever. However, it’s unnatural and will feel alien at first. That’s the whole reason I’ve written this book: to help guide you through the process, hold your hand, and give you all the hints and tips I’ve collected along the way.

In this book, together, we’ll explore the following minefields: The Resistance to Positivity. Relationships and Positivity. Positivity Hunting for Parents. Dealing with Uncertainty and the Absurd. Facing Failure and Finding Positives. Comparison and Self-worth. Positivity in the Mundane. Self-doubt and Inner Criticism. Positivity as an Act of Defiance. Embracing Impermanence. Continuing the Positivity Hunt. Positivity Hunters — Stories from the Wild.

All of these territories have been hunting grounds for me. I’ll share my experiences in each of these areas and give you customisable practices to try, with the goal of helping you create the lasting habits you need to become an expert positivity hunter!

Negative thoughts will always occur, but after reading this book, I hope you’ll be able to repel them and feel immediately better as a result. For every negative thought, I want you to be able to find two immediate positive ones. This might sound nearly impossible to you at this moment, but I promise you, if you stay with me until the end, you’ll see that Positivity Hunting works.

Will the absurdity of life continue to throw shit at you? Of course, it will. Should you take it personally? No. Is there always a positive to be found? Yes. Sometimes, that positive is hidden. Deep. But this book will give you the tools to unearth it, drag its little smiling face out of the dark, and feel the warmth it brings.

Seeking the positives in every situation requires training and a level of understanding that might seem improbable to you right now, but I’m here to tell you that it’s possible to smile when life tries to drag you down. It’s possible to laugh in the face of adversity. And it’s possible to see the positives in absolutely every situation, if you’re willing to keep up the hunt.

Try it now: grab a pen, some paper (or use your notes on your phone), and write down one thing you hated about your life this week.

Go now.

Then come back.

Done?

Great.

Now, and this will be difficult, I want you to write down two positives about that situation.

Here’s the key, at first: remove yourself from the equation. Could anyone see your hated thing as a positive in any way? If they could, then you’ve found your positives. If you think they couldn’t, don’t worry — that Positivity Hunting licence of yours is still relatively new. Keep reading, and you’ll find them.

The above task is merely a taster — an appetiser for things to come. If you managed to taste your first two positives, well done. With practice and guidance, you’ll be feasting on them soon enough. If you didn’t, don’t worry. It’s not easy to face absurdity head-on, look it in the eye, and say, “Fuck you, negativity. I want the positives.”

We live in a world where most people put on some kind of front in order to survive the day. If you’ve ever opened up to anyone about depression, anxiety, or grief, then you’ll know you’re not alone.

But how helpful is it to know that someone else is also suffering when you’re faced with negative thoughts all day, every day, mostly from inside your mind? The long and short answer is: it’s not. But your Positivity Hunting licence will help in ways that moral support simply can’t. It’s a habit of looking absurdity — aka life — in the eye and smiling right back at its sinister black holes.

Now, I’m not discrediting support from others — it’s great if you can get it, and you will find people if you’re open and honest with them about your problems. Yet, it’s not a solution because at some point you’ll be face-to-face with a huge negativity monster, and that person won’t be by your side to help you slay it.

However, that Positivity Hunting badge will help you. That huge, ugly monster will take one look at your shiny badge and immediately start to shrink.

You’ll be alone, but you’ll be fully equipped to deal with the situation. You’ll be able to find all the positivity creatures waiting in the wings to fight back with you.

This is a map to help you see where all the positivity creatures hide. Believe me, they’re sometimes really great at hiding. At first, they’ll seem shy, timid little things that don’t want to be found. And when you do find them, they’ll feel foreign, uncomfortable, and awkward. But with time, you’ll welcome them at every opportunity.

Be warned, fellow positivity hunter: the universe will fight back. Looking for positives will seemingly amplify the negatives. It will initially feel like more negativity has seeped into your life as your path starts to change, and like zombies chasing a meal, you’ll feel like a moving target. That’s because the universe knows that if everyone has their Positivity Hunting badge, the world becomes too one-sided. Absurdity needs a natural equilibrium of chaos and calm to fuel itself.

Stay strong. Keep reading and keep looking for those beautiful positives, and I promise you that you’ll find life is better than you ever imagined it could be, and nothing will ever hurt you in the same way again.

How this book came to be is a strange combination of depression, grief, and anger. At the time, when all of these elements were swirling in my mind, I felt I had nothing to be positive about. I was so alone and messed up that suicidal thoughts were a frequent occurrence.

Now, this isn’t a book about depression, alcoholism, grief, or anxiety, but they all play a role, as they were key in allowing the absurdity to thrive.

As a man in his early thirties, I was one bad day away from being another number in the suicide statistics. To tell you the truth, I was one lonely day away from joining those figures. I had planned it out — how and when — but I was never left alone long enough to carry out the plan.

Why am I telling you this in a book about Positivity Hunting? Surely, suicide and positivity are as far apart as can be? And that’s exactly why I’m telling you. I’ve been there. I’ve been so close to slipping away forever that I know Positivity Hunting will work for you. It brought me back from the brink of death, and I remember all the tools I picked up along the way. They’re not magic tools. They’re not unique to me. They have nothing to do with money, status, or anything outside your control. The best part? They’re freely available to you right now.

Another reason I’ve decided to talk about my suicidal experiences is because of a man named Albert Camus. When I was wallowing in pain, filled to the brim with negatives, some friends (trying to make light of my outlook) labelled me a nihilist. This prompted me to start reading about nihilism and existentialism, which ultimately led me to Camus.

Before stumbling upon Camus, however, I also explored various religions. For several weeks, I even entertained a pair of elderly Jehovah’s Witnesses, searching for anything to help me make sense of what I was feeling. I read every self-help book the bookstore could stock. I’d always feel a momentary lift — safe in the guidance of someone else — but none of those books or religious practices gave me what I was looking for. Then one day, I had a thought, combat the negative with two positives, and on that same day, I just so happened to discover a French philosopher. That’s when the notion of Positivity Hunting was born.

Camus’ ideas revolve around the tension between humanity’s desire to find inherent meaning in life and the indifferent, chaotic nature of the universe.

The Absurd is central to Camus’ philosophy. He describes it as the conflict between our search for meaning and the universe’s silence or meaninglessness.

This notion blew my mind — nothing had ever come close to explaining what I was feeling before. Reading that it’s natural to crave purpose and clarity, but that the universe is devoid of them, made sense. It makes everyday life easier to digest. And it makes Positivity Hunting essential to get the most out of the absurdity. You have to be the creator of your experiences and energy; remember, the universe is silent and void of meaning. This is the notion that Camus calls the Absurd, and you can’t escape it.

However, don’t worry—Camus doesn’t see this realisation as something that should lead to despair. He sees it as an opportunity to live fully, in defiance of this lack of meaning.

So, why all the talk of suicide? Well, Camus believes that once we recognise the Absurd, we have three potential responses:

1. Suicide: Giving up on life because it is meaningless (almost happened to me).

2. Philosophical Suicide: Clinging to illusions of meaning, like religion or ideology, to avoid confronting the Absurd (again, almost happened).

3. Revolt: Camus’ preferred approach and the reason for your Positivity Hunting licence. Revolt means not only accepting the Absurd but living with passion, vitality, integrity, and positivity! In his view, even if life has no ultimate meaning, we can still create personal meaning by embracing experiences, emotions, and actions, and by finding the positives in every situation. The act of living is, in and of itself, an act of defiance against the Absurd. The act of Positivity Hunting is not just a revolt against the Absurd—it’s a massive two fingers to the negatives lurking within it too.

The combination of the Absurd and Positivity Hunting has, and continues to, keep me away from the darkest corners of my mind. I’ve used Positivity Hunting in every aspect of my journey through the Absurd, and I can guarantee that it makes life better once it becomes your default.

If your mind is a maze, and negativity is the water rising slowly, ready to cut off your breath and watch you drown, then positivity is the drains and air vents — shifting the water out and providing you with clean, sustainable, and beautiful energy to keep wandering through the maze until you find where you need to be.

Join Camus and me in laughing and smiling in the face of the Absurd.

Take the meaninglessness of life and existence as the reason to hunt for the positives.

You don’t need to worry about how you’re perceived, how you look, how you’ll be remembered, or anything else that usually weighs you down — if the universe is meaningless, so are we, but that’s a beautiful and freeing thought. We make our own experiences, so why would we want to indulge in negativity when we can have positivity instead? Sing that song you love. Say that thing that makes you feel great. Smile when you feel like smiling. Keep hunting the positives to combat the challenges of life.

Positivity Hunting will help you live and thrive in the moment — if you take it seriously. Honestly, you’ll be surprised at just how much of a difference committing just one hour a day can make.

Start tomorrow: pick one hour when, whatever happens to you, you’ll immediately find two positives to combat each negative thought or experience. Observe how you feel during that hour. Acknowledge every positive thought, feeling, and emotion.

If you struggle at any point to find the positive, use the Absurd to fuel you. Take a breath. Really feel your lungs filling up with oxygen and observe that motion. The past is behind you. The future hasn’t arrived yet. There is only you, breathing.

If you’re finding the positives internally, can you commit to saying them out loud? Can you go one step further and say them to someone passing by? “Nice day, isn’t it?” or “Do you see that flower reaching for the sun?” Some of you may cringe at the very thought of saying that to a complete stranger, but why? You’re both stuck in the Absurd, moving towards the complete and total silence of the universe, one moment at a time. Why should you care what a stranger thinks of you? If they respond with something positive, great! You’ve both added another positive to your experiences and temporarily escaped the absurdity. If they don’t, it doesn’t matter anyway. You really do have nothing to lose and everything to gain.

If you can, I promise that if you commit to the above for one day at a time — no more, no less — you will see changes in your mental health, personality, and your ability to handle the Absurd.

At the end of your first day, reflect on how you felt during that hour, but don’t dwell on it. I’m not asking you to write anything down or record anything, but before you go to sleep, just reflect. If you enjoyed the first hour, do it again tomorrow. And if you’re feeling really adventurous, try two hours. Although it may seem small, that time in the positivity hunting space will add up, and the benefits will come flooding in. If you’re anything like me, you’ll become addicted to finding the positives in every situation.

Over the course of the next ten chapters, I’m going to share a range of tools for Positivity Hunting in every aspect of human life. I will always, always encourage you to stay in the moment as much as possible, as it’s the best hunting ground for positives. Less is happening in any given moment, so it’s easier to focus and find the good stuff, like breathing — we all love that, don’t we?

Jokes aside, here’s a tool that I’ve found particularly helpful when it comes to tackling bigger negatives, especially ones that require a decision….

The Scales of Truth.

These are essential in your Positivity Hunting kit. When I say, “Scales of Truth,” I like to visualise Anubis holding the scales — it adds a layer of dramatisation to the visual imagery.

Here’s how I use it: I place the negatives and the positives of whatever the big decision is on the scales and see which way it tips. You can do this in your mind, grab a pen and paper, or just type them into the notes on your phone. Saying them out loud works wonders too, as your tone will reveal your emotions. It’s really hard to say something with passion if you don’t truly believe it.

If the scales are too heavily weighted on the negatives, I cut it from the Absurd. It’s a dead weight, and ultimately the negatives within it will double and triple overtime. Negativity is worse than rabbits when it comes to breeding.

For example, alcohol for me had more negatives than positives, so it’s gone. I also had a promotion at work that made me unhappy — out came the scales, and I resigned. Were there positives and negatives on the scales? Of course, but if the negatives outweighed the positives by even one, it had to go. If it can’t go immediately, due to financial constraints or prior commitments, you need to take positive steps towards removing it from your life as soon as possible.

The Absurd really can be that simple if you want it to be. The universe, in and of itself, is meaningless. You create your own meaning, and you alone are responsible for your experience of the Absurd. You know it’s true. Have you ever told yourself, “This day is going to be horrible,” and you were right? You probably have, just like you’ve probably said, “This is going to be amazing,” and it turned out that way. You’ve likely had a few curveballs, too, where what you thought would be positive turned negative and vice versa. That’s because the Absurd is indifferent — it doesn’t give you the slightest consideration. Only you can make your experience positive or negative, and if you’re constantly looking for positives, are you going to have a better time of it? Of course, you are!

It’s far too easy to see the big-picture negative at any given moment, and of course, if you focus on one problem for too long, it’s going to manifest itself into becoming your whole life. But if you stay in the present, acknowledge, but ignore the Absurd, and use the positives you find to tackle the negatives in the moment, soon you’ll have far fewer of them, and the positives will begin to take over.

Have you ever lain awake at night and wondered what your purpose is? Why were you born in the first place? Why you never seem to catch a break, while everyone on your social media feed appears to be thriving? You’re not alone. This has happened — and continues to happen — to the majority of mankind since the beginning of time. We search for meaning because accepting or believing that we simply exist is an unbearably cruel concept. Life has to have a purpose, doesn’t it?

We are born with an insatiable appetite for meaning and an explanation of life. Institutions have spent, and continue to spend, billions on discovering the ‘true’ meaning of life. This search manifests in many ways: through religion, relationships, politics, careers, supporting certain sports teams, personal goals, etc. All of these are ways of trying to give our lives meaning, a sense of significance in the void.

For Camus, the universe is in direct contradiction with us in this venture. It thrives in chaos, was created in chaos, and is violently unpredictable. It’s often cruel. There’s never a rhyme or reason behind why bad things happen to good people, no divine justice or moral order. Basically, it’s a massive prick.

For Albert Camus, this creates a permanent disconnect between our search for meaning and the universe’s unrelenting unresponsiveness — it’s empty, and we long to be full. It’s the very definition of a toxic relationship: no matter how much effort we put into it, the universe will always do as it pleases, without showing any emotional attachment or responsibility to us.

Horrible, isn’t it? It’s no wonder depression is at an all-time high, suicide rates have risen, teenagers are crippled with anxiety, and stress is forcing people into early graves. The notion that we are truly alone in the universe, and that it couldn’t give a shit about us, can feel overwhelmingly negative — but it doesn’t have to be that way. This delusional, one-sided relationship is what Camus refers to as the Absurd. No matter how hard we search for the answers to life’s ultimate questions, we will never be given the answers.

If you’ve ever felt that you just can’t catch a break or haven’t reached your potential, that’s the Absurd messing with you — our desire for meaning, clarity, and understanding, and the universe’s refusal to give them to us. The Absurd is that void between what we crave at our very core — meaning, order, and fairness — and what the universe offers us — chaos, indifference, and silence.

Camus’ philosophical ideas suggest that, in order to revolt, thrive, and ultimately survive, we need to become more than our desire for meaning. We need to evolve to find meaning in every given moment.

When I was suicidal, I remember feeling completely stuck in my own life. I felt that so much had gone ‘wrong,’ and I believed that any clear path to a sense of meaning had been completely blocked. I’d lost all enthusiasm for anything and everything — nothing felt strong enough to keep me tethered to this floating globe. I wanted to escape the Absurd. But as soon as I stopped looking for answers and started looking for the positives, my outlook began to shift. That morning coffee became profound. It sounds stupid, but once I realised, I could create the meaning I lacked from external answers internally, with my own mind, the floodgates of positivity opened. And I now believe that if the meanings you seek are negative, then your whole existence will become negative. If you hunt positives… well… you get the idea.

Camus used the Greek myth of Sisyphus as a metaphor for explaining our existence. Sisyphus is condemned by the gods to eternally roll a boulder up a hill, only for it to roll back down each time he reaches the top. Despite the futility of his task, Sisyphus continues pushing that bastard boulder up the hill. Every day. Just like we put on our big boy pants and get up every morning. Camus saw this as a symbol of the human condition: our lives may be repetitive and meaningless, but we must imagine Sisyphus happy. We must imagine he was a positivity hunter, as he accepts the Absurd and continues to live with purpose and dignity despite it. I can find a few positives for pushing a boulder up a hill every day. One — his arms must have been the envy of all his friends, and with a name like Sisyphus, he would have needed a distinguishing feature. Two — his work ethic and commitment to literally pushing the negatives up and out of the way every day make him a true great in the positivity hunting community.

When you realise that the universe doesn’t owe you meaning and isn’t going to give you one, no matter how much you beg and plead, it’s actually very liberating. To use Camus’ terminology, we have the opportunity to revolt — break away from the toxicity of our one-sided relationship with the universe and start focusing our time and energy on positivity hunting instead. And like Sisyphus pushing his giant ball of negativity, we can find happiness along the way. Imagine his massive smile as he struggles to push his boulder up the hill.

We’ve all met these types of people in our lives — the world could be burning around them, and they’re always happy. They’re always positive. Well, you can be one of those people — an inspiration to others in the Absurd. A source of comfort in a cold and heartless universe. Wouldn’t that be great?

If you stick with me, together we’ll learn the necessary skills to use the absurdity of life as a way of crafting joy and happiness into your experience. We’ll cultivate mindfulness and help one another keep the pesky little negatives out of our way. There are countless ways in which we can all become positivity hunters, but first, you need to give the universe the middle finger. It doesn’t serve you. It doesn’t care about what you think, say, or pray. It simply is. It’s time for you to be a bit selfish too — focusing on your growth, positivity, and happiness instead of what the universe expects of you because, as we know, it expects nothing. It’s a prick.